News around the pseudo-sports world last week was all about Skip Bayless and his not-so-sincere retelling of his high school basketball days. He likened himself to Russell Westbrook in an attempt to give him some basketball cred, only the world found out that Skip wasn't exactly a threat on his high school basketball team, unless he was threatening to warm a cold bench.
ESPN has turned into more of an entertainment network these days, I'm well aware of this, but Skip gets so out of control sometimes that it's hard to imagine him as anything more than Glen Beck yelling about sports. All he's missing is a chalkboard and a few chubby tears.
Usually, I do my best to take what Skip is saying with a grain of salt, and then a spoonful of salt, and then another few spoonfuls and you'll get to the kernel of truth that is deep down in his insane-asylum rant of an argument.
Basically, his biggest NBA arguments go as follows; LeBron James shrinks in big situations, the new breed of point guards are just short shooting guards, LeBron James shrinks in big situations, Dwight Howard isn't quite as good as his numbers say and LeBron James shrinks in big situations. That's not completely insane sounding, right?
However, we are talking about Skip Bayless, and he'll spout off some nonsense from time to time that even I couldn't defend, and if I tried to, I'm pretty sure Stephen A. Smith would show up at my door and make this face at me.Â
Here I have the most ridiculous of those arguments, the most incredulous words to come out of that man's mouth, relating to the NBA (so that means no Tim Tebow talk!).
Carmelo Anthony Is Better Than LeBron James
Chris Trotman/Getty Images
Let me get a quick rundown of Skip Bayless' core principles when it comes to athletes. Skip loves Tim Tebow because he's a winner, and even though he doesn't always have the best games, he comes out on top.
So, when you go to compare LeBron James to Carmelo Anthony, you'd have to think he'd pick LeBron, right? I mean sure, Carmelo won a National Title with Syracuse, but we're talking about the NBA here.
Well, as recently as this season Skip has said that he sees Carmelo Anthony as a better player than LeBron James, completely leaving LeBron out of his top five NBA players to boot.
We're talking about a two-time MVP-winning basketball player who has been to the NBA Finals twice, compared to a guy who has only made it out of the first round of the playoffs one time.
He Doesn't Like Derrick Rose Running the Bulls Offense
Kevin C. Cox/Getty Images
Skip Bayless starts out this dandy of an argument with the doozy, "I love Derrick Rose off the floor, but I don't love Derrick Rose on the floor." Cue Stephen A. getting his daily paycheck by making ridiculous faces.
He complains about Rose shooting too much and not being a real facilitator, but in all honesty, this man is talking about the reigning MVP, how can an argument be made that he shouldn't be playing his original position for a team that's on its way to the best record in the NBA?
The best part about the entire video is Stephen A's reaction with just an endless stream of him incredulously shouting, "Derrrrrick Roooooooseeee?" Derrrrick Roooooooooooooooseeeee?"Â
Kyrie Irving Will Be a Better Player Than Derrick Rose
Chris Chambers/Getty Images
Sometimes you can go out on a limb and say this player is going to be better than that player and have some sort of leeway with it, but when you take a rookie and more or less guarantee that he'll be better than the reigning MVP, then you're asking for trouble.
Skip tweeted a few months back about Kyrie Irving and his likelihood of developing into a player who is more productive and valuable to his team than Derrick Rose.
Don't get me wrong, that's something I'd love to see, but am I crazy enough to say out loud that I think it could happen? Not quite.Â
The Magic (circa at Least 2011) Are Better with Marcin Gortat on Offense
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In a debate that happened as recently as the playoffs in 2009 (the upload date for the video is May 2009), Skip went on to say that the Magic were better off on the offensive end of the floor with Marcin Gortat instead of Dwight Howard.
There are quite a few problems I have with this argument.
First, this year was the first full year that Marcin Gortat played in the league, you can't exactly base what you think about a player that early in his career, they haven't had a chance to pan out yet.
Second, Skip gives absolutely no numbers to back this up, only stating that he's more polished offensively.
And third, there's a point where Skip struggles to remember Marcin Gortat's name in the argument, which leads me to believe that he's just talking to hear his own voice at this point.
Blake Griffin Didn't Jump That High
Everybody remembers this dunk (whether it was a dunk is up for debate, that's fine) from Blake Griffin on Kendrick Perkins earlier this season. Some people love it, others hate it, your side doesn't really matter for this one.
Any rational human being can look at this dunk and even with the most biased attitude look at Blake Griffin get up and at least think something along the lines of, "Damn, he got up there."
That's why, when Skip goes off to say that Griffin didn't even jump that high in this clip, you have to wonder if you've been taking crazy pills.
LeBron James Isn't a Top Five Player in the NBA
Chris Chambers/Getty Images
If you want to witness the dumbest moment in television history, and I'm talking from the very beginning of the talk-box, just take a look at this beauty of a debate.
Skip and Stephen A. are revealing who they believe to be the five best players in the NBA. That seems like a pretty basic debate, right? Well, both of them swung for the controversy fences and ended up striking out by a mile.
Skip goes first and, as you would expect, LeBron James' name is curiously absent from his top five. However, Stephen A. goes and he seems to be missing the very same player.
Do they really expect us to believe that neither of them think LeBron is one of the five best players in the NBA? Really?
Michael Jordan Won Titles by Himself
Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images
There are some times where comments need elaborated upon, and this was definitely one of those times.
During a show this year, Skip uttered something that made my jaw hit the floor and sent every basketball fan into an uproar at the same time, claiming that Michael Jordan didn't have help winning any championships.
It's a good thing Scottie Pippen, Dennis Rodman, Toni Kukoc, Charles Oakley, John Paxson, Horace Grant and a fellow named Phil Jackson weren't in the room with him or this might have gotten embarrassing.Â
Carmelo Game 2 Against Boston Was Better Than LeBron's Game 5 Against Detroit
Nick Laham/Getty Images
Last year, Carmelo Anthony had a killer Game 2 against the Boston Celtics in the first round of the playoffs. He went off for 42 points, 17 rebounds and 7 assists and his team ended up losing. Great game, without a doubt.
However, the guys went on to debate whether or not it was as good as LeBron James' historic Game 5 against the Detroit Pistons back in 2007, you know, that game where LeBron scored 29 of the Cavaliers last 30 points to win the game for Cleveland.
Quite frankly, Skip is calling a performance by Carmelo in a loss a better game than the greatest individual performance in the history of the Cleveland Cavaliers.
His two arguments? He cites the fact that Carmelo scored his points in regulation and that LeBron had a chance to win the game in regulation but missed the free throws that would have won the game.
Ummm...what?
Michael Jordan Could Beat LeBron James One-on-One...Today
Streeter Lecka/Getty Images
Obviously, if we're going to have a debate over who would win a one-on-one game to 21, 13, 7 or 284 in their prime, I'm picking Michael Jordan every time. He's so competitive that there's no way he's going to end up losing.
However, to think that (at the time of Skip's comments) a 49-year-old man could beat one of the top athletes in the world in his prime is just plain crazy talk. That's exactly what Skip tried to tell Chris Broussard on the show a few years back.
There are some times when Skip Bayless' remarks are fun and kooky, this one is just plain kooky.
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